Post by Nishimiya Momoko on Aug 15, 2019 19:26:06 GMT -6
||| NISHIMIYA MOMOKO |||
Mahougasawa Akane ; Kanojo ga Flag o Oraretars
#Name ; Nishimiya Momoko
#Age ; 15
#Gender ; Female
#Sexuality ; Lesbian
#D.O.B. ; March 10th, 1988
#Occupation ; Full-Time Student / Waitress
#Year and class ; 1-B
#Height ; 5'4"
#Weight ; 110 lbs
#Physique ; Curvy - Momoko's physique is the first thing that people (mostly teenage guys) tend to notice about her. She is very well-developed for her age, with a decent amount of curves and a larger-than-average chest area.
#Hair color and style ; Her hair is dark brown, although it fades into a light pink at the ends. Her hair is also curly, cascading down her back. She always has large pink bows in her hair, each with a smaller bow attached to the large bow.
#Eye color ; Yellow
#Clothing styles ; Momoko likes to wear Lolita fashion, most specifically Sweet Lolita. Her favorite brand is Angelic Pretty - their clothes, a perfect mix of childlike innocence and elegance, never fail to charm her! Unfortunately, Lolita is expensive and she can only buy her clothes online, so she cannot wear Lolita as much as she'd like to. When she isn't wearing it, she prefers wearing things like clothes that are frilly or ruffled - blouses, skirts, thigh highs, etc. All of her clothes give off a very 'cute and innocent' vibe.
#Personality ;Momoko is an absolute sweetheart. She is the type of person who is always willing to befriend another person, regardless of the rumors that she has heard about them. In her opinion, it's a bit silly to avoid someone all because of some rumors that are likely not even try. Besides, she has found that judging people without even speaking to them can make you lose out on so many wonderful friendships.
She becomes flustered and blushes very easily, to the point of it being comical. This is especially true when it comes to people praising or complimenting her - for example, if someone were to compliment the food she made, she would become a flustered mess unable to form a single coherent sentence. Nobody knows why Momoko blushes so easily, not even her. She's just always been that way.
Momoko doesn't hate herself for liking girls, and she wishes she could be more open about her sexuality. It's difficult for her to hide it. But at the same time, the thought of someone finding out that she likes girls makes her feel physically ill. People knowing has caused her so much pain in the past, because it made her feel constantly reminded of how people saw her as abnormal or a freak.
However, if she believes that she can trust someone Momoko will be open about her sexuality. She never comes out, per say. She casually mentions one of her crushes on a girl and chooses what she'll say next based on their reaction. If they seem cool about it and treat it as any other crush, she'll be more willing to be open about it to them. She'll even joke around about how she's so stupid that a girl could straight-up say they wanted to be in a relationship with her and she wouldn't understand. However, she actually isn't stupid. She's just insecure. The idea of someone dating her is so surreal that if someone said "I would date you" to her, she would automatically think that this would make sense if this was anyone else but she, personally, is unlovable so there must be some hidden meaning behind these words.
She is a hopeless romantic, and tends to develop strong crushes very easily. Unfortunately, she also has a tendency to fall for girls who are either straight, have no interest in her, or don't even know she exists. It seems that she is unable to have a crush on someone who would potentially like her back. It's really a problem, and sometimes causes Momoko to worry that she'll never find someone. However, she tries her best to be optimistic. She's only fifteen, after all! She has plenty of time to find a girl who likes her. Hopefully.
She prefers to think about the romantic, more innocent part of relationships. It's partly because she prefers that type of stuff, but there's also another reason: it has been so drilled into her that she is predatory, and as a result talking or thinking about doing anything remotely sexual with a girl floods her with guilt and internalized homophobia.
Momoko is very motherly, and is definitely the "mom friend" in her group. She is always the person to work with peoples' problems, or help with their schoolwork. Not only that, but she always seems to be prepared. If you need something, it's likely that she'll have it in her bag. Pencil? No problem. Band-aids? Sure. Rubbing alcohol? Yeah, she has that too. She would honestly make a wonderful mother someday, although she isn't even sure she wants kids. She is content with taking care of her friends.
In her opinion, one of the most humiliating and demoralizing things is having a heterosexual girl thinking she wants to be in a relationship because she likes girls. It really messed with her friendships in middle school, because while other girls sit on each others laps and sleep in the same bed and playfully grab each others chest, she has to put up so many walls just in case her friends think she's after them. Because of this, she constantly worries about being friends with other girls. Even when they have no idea she's gay, it makes her feel so predatory and disgusting.
#History ;
Momoko was born into a perfect family. Well, perfect in her opinion. Her mother and father, Saito and Ochako, were the type of people that everyone was friends with - especially when it came to Ochako. She was the kindest person one would ever meet in their entire life, comparable to a literal angel. It was nearly impossible not to be charmed by her.
Her parents had both worked, with Saito being a police officer and Ochako being an elementary school teacher. However, she resigned from her job when Momoko was born, as she had to take care of her daughter. She was a wonderful mother, always so patient and loving towards Momoko. She would never raise her voice at the child, and treated her with respect. She wasn't the type of parent who talked down to Momoko or treated her as less of a person because of her young age.
Saito often spoiled his wife and daughter. He would never hesitate to buy them gifts or take them out to restaurants. Luckily, he made a decent amount of money and could afford them without any problems. They weren't rich by any means, but they had enough money to provide what was needed and spend money on frivolities. He also made sure to prioritize living expenses above things like presents.
At school, Momoko was rather popular. Although she was much more shy when she was younger, there was something about her that drew people in and made them want to be friends with her. She slowly opened up and got out of her shell, and actually started approaching people and making an effort to make new friends.
It was around her first year of middle school that she developed her first crush: on a girl. She didn't understand it was a crush, because she had never even considered the fact that girls could like other girls - all she know was that this girl made her heart skip a beat, and she wanted to hold her hand and spend all day with her. She followed this girl around constantly, enthusiastically agreeing with everything she said.
Momoko didn't realize that she had a crush on her until after all of her friends had been talking about their crushes in guys at a sleepover, and she said she didn't like any of the boys at her school. As she went to bed, she thought about her romance seemed so difficult and she was glad she didn't have to deal with that. Almost immediately, the girl who she had a crush on popped up in her mind. It was as if a light bulb had turned on inside her head - she had a crush on that girl. How had she not realized it before?
She felt confused by these feelings, and decided to go to the one person who she told everything to: her mom. She came home right after the sleepover, approached her mom and said "Mama, I have a crush on a girl."
Her mother was wonderful about it. She seemed a bit surprised, but also treated it as any other crush - she asked her name, if she was cute and all of the things that a mother teasing her daughter about their first crush would do. But she did say one thing that was different from others: she told Momoko not to tell anyone else. She said that not everybody thought that girls liking other girls was okay, and that it would be a better idea for her to keep a secret.
Momoko didn't want to upset her mother, but that's exactly what she did. It was hard, though. She felt so isolated from her friends because she couldn't talk about her crushes with them. Whenever they talked out boys, she would pretend to like some random boy in their class just so she could be included. She felt horrible for lying to her friends but couldn't see any other solution.
She first told her friends that she liked girls in her third year of middle school, near the beginning. They had been talking about crushes and...well, Momoko hadn't meant to admit she had a crush on another girl in their class but it just slipped out.
The reactions were horrible.
Nearly all of her friends reacted with disgust, wrinkling their noses and giggling shrilly as they shrieked about how liking other girls was gross. They were also very quick to accuse Momoko of having a crush on all of them, even though this was not the case. She didn't think of any of her friends romantically! She tried to explain this, but none of them believed her. They ran away very quickly, as if Momoko had some type of disease that they would catch if they didn't get away from her.
It hurt a lot. These girls had been friends since they were little kids, and they were all ditching her because of something she had no control over. Not only that, but they thought it was okay to tell everyone about it. It only took a few weeks for the entire school to know that Momoko liked girls. This was when the bullying started.
The bullying started off smile: people would shove her into walls, trip her in the hallways, whisper things behind her back, etc. Little things like that. As time went on, the bullying became much worse. People would steal and hide her personal items, put loads of threatening letters in her shoe locker, deface her school desk with cruel words written in black marker. Momoko never complained to anyone about the bullying. She bore it with a sense of finality, with a sense of hopelessness. People hated her because she liked girls and there was nothing she could do about it.
Momoko is going to be starting her first year at Hikarizaka Private High School soon. She's going to try and hide her sexuality as best as she can from now on. She wants to be open and proud about it, but it just doesn't seem like a possibility at the moment. Maybe in the future, but for now she's going to stay hidden deep inside the closet. It's cozy in there.The Roleplayer's Corner
#Nickname ; Milkii
#Age ; 14
#Gender ; Female
#Roleplay Experience ; About four years of roleplaying.
#Experience with Clannad ; I still haven't watched it. I'm going too soon, though.
#How did you find us? ; I was searching for 'Clannad' in Google, and came across this
#Sample Writing ;(I copy and pasted this from a thread on my other account, because I really don't have the energy to write something out)
Hanako loved the library.
It didn't matter which library it was, so long as it wasn't too crowded or loud. Hanako hated places that were crowded or loud. She particularly like the library of Hikarizaka Private High School, though. She'd have to say it was her favorite library that she had ever been in.
It gave off the vibe of a vintage bookshop, with old wooden bookshelves lining the walls and set up in neat rows throughout the room, loaded with hundreds upon hundreds of secondhand books. There was a strange wistfulness to it — filled with thousands of old books you'll never have time to read, each of which is itself locked in its own era, bound and dated and papered over like an old room the author abandoned years ago, a hidden annex littered with thoughts left just as they were on the day they were captured.
She always found comfort in being surrounded by books. Even when everything was too loud and bright and simply too much, she found that books had the strange ability to make her feel at ease. They could be considered something of a comfort item for her. That was why she had decided to go to the library during her lunch break, spending her time running her fingers along the spines of the books.
Hanako hadn't been having a good day today. Everything she did seemed to require an extensive amount of energy. Even forcing herself to get out of bed that morning had been a chore. She felt like there was a heavy pressure on her body — and not the good type of pressure, like her weighted blanket provided. No, this felt more like heavy bags of sand were sitting on her chest.
She thought that maybe it would've gotten better when she arrived at school, but she was very wrong. It had only gotten worse Everything seemed magnified — the lights, the noise, the people. Everything was an assault on her senses, and she felt as if all the sensory things were going to make her explode. But they didn't. Rather, they made her withdraw. She couldn't speak, as it took up for too much energy for her to do so. It was even too difficult to make a facial expression, so she'd been walking around with an emotionless look on her face for nearly the entire day. '
And now here she was, in the library. She still felt drained, but being surrounded by books made it a bit better. She even mustered up enough energy for a small smile to grace her lips. Yes, everything was perfect right now. She would have to deal with all the things that had made her overwhelmed later, but that didn't matter right now. Nothing mattered right now.
She sat against one of the bookshelves, crossing her legs in a criss-cross position, and pulled one of the books off of the shelf. She peered curiously at the title. Seven Japanese Tales, it read. The cover was of a pale, black-haired woman. She looked to be asleep. Or perhaps she was just resting her eyes.
Hanako put the book on the shelf after reading a few pages. It simply wasn't her cup of tea. She preferred nicer, more simple stories. Her favorite stories were children's tales. They were easier to focus on, and her brain didn't get overwhelmed with all of the information. But she had a feeling that the school library didn't have any children's tales. So, rather than finding a book, she simply sat there with her head tilted up towards the roof. It was nice.