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Post by Otomo Kojiro on Jun 28, 2012 21:38:02 GMT -6
Beep, beep, beep.
Koji did not mind hospitals. Aside from their peculiar disinfectant smell, and looming sense of death, he did not mind them. He preferred to think of them as places of healing, where people came out well rather than go there to die.Today seemed like such thoughts were in another hospital, with another Kojiro Otomo.
The young teen bit his lip, flexing his hand as he hesitated several times, and several times again with the door handle. He had found himself wondering why he was even bothering to do this. Guilt perhaps. Yet all he felt inside was bitterness, and anger towards the very ill man, laying behind this door of wood, glass and metal. The man he knew, and despised for being selfish and cruel towards the woman he swore to love, in sickness and in health.
Perhaps he deserved this turn of fate.
What he knew only made him feel worse about it. His father, in his mother's absence by his own doing, had apparently grown addicted to drugs, and it had completely ruined his heart valves. He had suffered a serious heart attack, and was in very real danger of passing away before the month was over.
He had contacted his sons. Jun did not respond. Koji, against both his own better judgment, and moral fibers however, did, and was here now. Perhaps the old man simply wanted forgiveness on his deathbed as if a dying atheist was beseeching god to save his soul. He kicked himself for this. He kicked himself for thinking of not doing this. Regardless of his sins and troubles, the man was still his father. Koji, one last time, reached for the door handle, and twisted it downwards.
Koji's heart raced, and his eyes widened. With several IVs and tubes coming out of the man, he looked the picture of death itself. His complexion was ghostly pale, his eyes dark and sunken-looking. A machine was assisting him with breathing. Koji grit his teeth, and took those precious few steps to his father's side.
Turning his weary head, and looking upon Koji with two almost-dead eyes, his father smiled.
"Hi son... I was hoping you would come."
Koji pursed his lips, averting his eyes.
"I said I would." He mumbled grimly, his fringe covering his gaze. He glimpsed at his father, only through the partings in his hair, refusing to make direct eye contact. Masato Otomo grunted affirmatively.
"You're a good boy Koji, coming to see me like this after... Well, I suppose that doesn't matter now." Masato huffed weakly, a gurgly chest cough emanating from his form to the rhythm of the heart monitor's beeps.
"It's more than you deserve." Koji responded flatly, letting Masato know exactly how he felt. Masato reached out his hand, tugging on the length of cannula for reach, to grasp the edges of Koji's school jacket with his fingers. Koji simply stepped back, and Masato let his frail hand fall to the bed.
"I'm sorry son." He croaked.
"Are you?" Koji snapped sharply, finally looking up at the man with a scowl. Masato's mouth hung open, and he managed to shake his head.
"No... I suppose I'm not, or I wouldn't have done it," he mused, averting his own gaze now, "shows how bad a father I am when my own boy is lecturing me."
Koji's scowl fell, nearly right off his face, to scurry under the bed and die.
"I don't expect you to forgive me Koji." Masato said after a lengthy silence, save for the respirator's hiss, and the steady pulse of the heart rate monitor. Koji's voice was quiet and cold.
"Good. Because I'm not going to."
"That's alright. You shouldn't take pity on a cruel old man that hurts his own family. Guess... Guess I'm getting what I deserved." Masato agreed, coughing again, he grasped his right-hand ring finger, much to Koji's surprise, he plucked off his wedding ring. He had no idea his father was still wearing it.
"Why did you do it?" Was all Koji could utter out. He was more sad than angry now, and couldn't hold onto that hatred for this man any longer, regardless of what he had done to his mother... His brother, and to him.
"Because I was a weak old fool." Responded his father, holding out the golden band to Koji. Koji hesitantly took it, and held it in his open palm.
"Shou-chan came in earlier, shouted at me until the nurse asked her to leave. Said I deserved to die..." Masato started, managing to utter a chuckle, "She's so like Rei. Told me you're making new friends. Promise me something Koji."
"What?"
"Don't be a fool like me. If you find a woman you love with all your heart, give this to her, and you hold onto her tightly. Don't throw it all away like me."
Koji's eyes glazed over, but he steeled himself enough to nod. At least his advice and suggestions were sound of mind. Exactly the kind of thing a father should tell his boy to do. Be faithful, and kind. The opposite of what Otomo Masato was.
"I don't know why you did it, and I don't care. I can't forgive you for it," Koji started, his eyes watering up, "but I appreciate you accepting you were wrong to do it."
Masato nodded. He was a good boy at heart, even if he still hated his father, it was fine. What he did deserved to be hated, but he couldn't
"Don't get into too much trouble at school. Go to college. But don't let a wonderful girl go for even a second. Make your mother and Ken-san proud of you. You'll do great things. I know you can. Any son of Haruka's can."
A nurse entered the room with a cheery sorry-for-interrupting look, with two fresh drips and a clean pillow. She, apologetically asked Koji to leave as visiting hours were now over. Koji himself apologized for overstaying his welcome by coming so late, and he obliged. Before leaving completely, the young boy halted his steps, stopping at the door. He took another glance at the ring in his hand and turned.
"Bye Dad." He declared, with no more malice in his voice. Masato smiled again, and seemed to be somewhat at peace with himself. Koji himself felt unburdened now that he had managed to let go of at least some of his bitterness. It was liberating, even as his father gave him one last piece of advice.
"You take care of your mother, and yourself son."
Nodding, Koji exited the room, and left the ward speedily. He didn't want to spend another minute in the hospital. Once out, he decided that, despite the advanced hour, he would walk his way to Jun's and stay there for the night.
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